>>WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD? >> >>Plato: >> For the greater good. >> >>Karl Marx: >> It was an historical inevitability. >> >>Thomas de Torquemada: >> Give me ten minutes with the chicken and I'll find out. >> >>Timothy Leary: >> Because that's the only kind of trip the Establishment would let >> it take. >> >>Oliver North: >> National Security was at stake. >> >>Carl Jung: >> The confluence of events in the cultural gestalt necessitated that >> individual chickens cross roads at this historical juncture, and >> therefore synchronicitously brought such occurrences into being. >> >>Jean-Paul Sartre: >> In order to act in good faith and be true to itself, the chicken >> found it necessary to cross the road. >> >>Albert Einstein: >> Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road crossed the >> chicken depends upon your frame of reference. >> >>Bhuddha: >> If you ask this question, you deny your own chicken-nature. >> >>Darwin: >> It was the logical next step after coming down from the trees.. >> >>Emily Dickinson: >> Because it could not stop for death. >> >>Ralph Waldo Emerson: >> It didn't cross the road; it transcended it. >> >>Johann Friedrich von Goethe: >> The eternal hen-principle made it do it. >> >>Ernest Hemingway: >> To die. In the rain. >> >>David Hume: >> Out of custom and habit. >> >>Saddam Hussein: >> This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite >> justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it. >> >>Jack Nicholson: >> 'Cause it (censored) wanted to. That's the (censored) reason. >> >>Ronald Reagan: >> I forget. >> >>John Sununu: >> The Air Force was only too happy to provide the transportation, >> so quite understandably the chicken availed himself of the >> opportunity. >> >>Sappho: Due to the loveliness of the hen on the other side, more fair >> than all of Hellas' fine armies. >> >>Henry David Thoreau: >> To live deliberately ... and suck all the marrow out of life. >> >>Mark Twain: >> The news of its crossing has been greatly exaggerated. >> >>Captain James T. Kirk: >> To boldly go where no chicken has gone before. >> >>Machiavelli: >> So that its subjects will view it with admiration, as a chicken >> which has the daring and courage to boldly cross the road, but >> also with fear, for whom among them has the strength to contend >> with such a paragon of avian virtue? In such a manner is the >> princely chicken's dominion maintained. >> >>Andersen Consultant: >> Deregulation of the chicken's side of the road was threatening >> its dominant market position. The chicken was faced with significant >> challenges to create and develop the competencies required for the >> newly competitive market. Andersen Consulting, in a partnering >> relationship with the client, helped the chicken by rethinking its >> physical distribution strategy and implementation processes. Using >> the Poultry Integration Model (PIM) Andersen helped the chicken use >> its skills, methodologies, knowledge capital and experiences to align >> the chicken's people, processes and technology in support of its >> overall strategy within a Program Management framework. Andersen >> Consulting convened a diverse cross-spectrum of road analysts and >> best chickens along with Andersen consultants with deep skills in the >> transportation industry to engage in a two-day itinerary of meetings >> in order to leverage their personal knowledge capital, both tacit and >> explicit, and to enable them to synergize with each other in order to >> achieve the implicit goals of delivering and successfully >> architecting and implementing an enterprise-wide value framework >> across the continuum of poultry cross-median processes. The meeting >> was held in a park like setting enabling and creating an impactful >> environment which was strategically based, industry-focused, and >> built upon a consistent, clear, and unified market message and >> aligned with the chicken's mission, vision, and core values. This was >> conducive towards the creation of a total business integration >> solution. Andersen Consulting helped the chicken change to become >> more successful.